Do we need to relearn how to think for ourselves?

We all like to think, that we make our own minds up about various things we must decide; but in reality do we, or do we allow ourselves to be influenced by those around us? Are we influenced by our own values or beliefs or those of the dominant groups around us?

Let’s think about a simple decision what to wear for a party we have been invited to. We may have in our minds eye dress/suit/other clothing we think will be suitable. Next we may ring our girlfriends what they are wearing and that decision may be changed by what they tell us. A partner may ask his girlfriend, who may tell him what he is thinking of wearing is totally unsuitable and he changes his mind.

What about more difficult decisions like who your friends are, how do we do that? Is it a business decision or a status decision that closes the deal for you? Do you pick friends who will support you and be there for you? Or do you pick friends who will further your career or standing in life? Who’s names you can drop into a conversation with others, to feel more important?

It is hard in a world are people constantly competing with each other to make our own decisions. Especially decisions that may prove to be unpopular; but if you want a successful and happy life in the real sense of the word we must be first true to ourselves. To live authentically and be able to look yourself in the eye, you will need to be loving and giving to our fellow woman/man. Even if the people we like do not fit into everyone else’s boxes at least our friends will trust what we say and not be suspicious of us.

Have we forgotten what friends are supposed to be, aren’t they there to assist us when we need help. For no other reason than they love us and want to share our joy and pain. Have we forgotten that our clothes are an expression of our individuality and not a badge that says we belong to the same group of people.

We are all individuals, we are all unique but sometimes we forget that, and become sheep following the flock. It is easy to be a follower but hard to be different; it takes guts and it takes true courage. Think carefully next time you make a decision, am I making this decision or is someone else making it for me? Are you a product of your environment do you follow the popular crowd or do you dare to walk your own walk?




  1. Laurence Britt

    Lovely post Athena, keep sending us these gems of wisdom.

  2. I made a decision to leave all my family in Australia to be with my soulmate in the UK. At 55, it was a difficult decision to make. I cannot imagine life without my partner but do struggle at times. It’s a challenge that’s for sure. I’m sure things will settle down as I get to know more people here and settle into my new life. I seem to have found your blog at the right time. Love it. 🙂

    • Thank you for reading my post.It means so much that it has touched you and found you at the right time. I have just read some of your posts they are inspiring and well written. If you need a new friend I am here.

      • Thank you so much. The angels are definitely sending out magic today. 🙂

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